journey back

so i'm finally an U.S. citizen. hallelujah!

my way back to poland was an adventure in itself. first of all, i got to pretend to be jason bourne. since i changed my legal name and got my new U.S. passport, it didn't match my ticket name. so i had to whip out my old Korean passport and use that instead whenever i boarded the plane but took out my U.S. passport whenever i went through customs. yes, the thrill of a double life.

and then, i got the worst possible seat on the flight back to amsterdam. where, you ask? right next to the bathroom, not behind, not in front, but NEXT to it. what kind of ridiculous design is that? as we are boarding, this guy decides to take a dump in the bathroom. when he came out, oh Lord have mercy. me and the guy next to me look at each other and open our eyes open wide as to agree that we are indeed sitting in the worst place. and few seconds later, all the passengers start to gag and gasp as the nasty fragrance travelled further. and some outspoken passengers start to demand from flight attendants to do something. the flight attendant was a hoot, too. she was like "what, this is disgusting! who did this????" she goes in the bathroom and screams "what the hell!!!" she then comes out, grabs the air freshner and says to the passengers around her "wish me luck" as she extends only her arm into the bathroom and sprays it 'til we're gagging from the unnatural floral scent. . . . this was the most unprofessional but hilarious action i saw from a flight attendant - only in US airlines, i tell you.

so the rest of the trip consisted of me getting up to close the bathroom door whenever someone left it open - actually me and this other guys took turns. . . . i couldn't believe how many people actually left without making sure that the door was closed. i mean, c'mon, etiquette 101 please. at one point, i was so sick of it, i grabbed one lady's arm and said "can you please close the door" and sure enough the one time i spoke out, the lady goes "but someone else is going in..." sheesh.

so needless to say, i'm glad to be home. some of you have asked if my kids missed me. i have the most resilient children in the world. i didn't speak with them for the first couple of days, since i was afraid that it would trigger somekind of a meltdown. what was i thinking? they were having so much fun with joe's parents, i don't think they barely noticed that i was gone. when i finally saw them over the webcam, the first thing that came out of makayla's mouth was "mommy, show me my camera! show me my watch! did you get the m&m's???" (i promised to get her a camera and a watch for her birthday...) and ethan was just munching on his grapes barely saying "hi". at least i know that they will survive anywhere. oh, and some have suggested that children often act tough when their parents aren't around and have a mini-breakdown when they actually see their parents. when i arrived, my children gave me a huge hug and said "is my camera in your bag??" and ethan goes "chhhhh-chhh-o-co-lat???" go figure.